Growing up

When does it happen and where does it come from? Where do the fairy tales go and also Santa with the little boots waiting for him and also the childhood songs? When do we know that it was the last time we rode our bikes with our friends? Where are the places we used to play hide and seek, dusty clothes and bonfires at sunset in the summer time? Where are the Sunday bath and all the preparations for school or kindergarten? Where did they all go, Harap Alb, Cinderella, Snow White and Pinocchio? I miss the innocent and charming little white lies of childhood. The childhood charms went away and I don’t know when and why I let it go away. Just a few years ago we were folding toys, now we are folding envelopes, I used to count my dolls, now I count my money, we used to argue over toy cars, now we argue over properties. Even willing to be kind, you just can’t do it anymore. Caged lions are jokes comparing to the jungle we are now spending our lives in. Is just that we, humans, are just more elevated and a bit more diplomatic, I could say. There are just some extreme situations when we bite each other, physically attacking each other, but we threw words to each other just like monkeys used to throw oranges at the circus when we were little.


I remember how eager I was to grow up, to be an adult, to go to work, drive a car and have money in my pocket. Why the hell was I in such a hurry? What justifies this rush to grow up? As a child, you imagine that growing up would set you free, but in fact, all its empty promises just restrain you, turning you into a complete stranger for yourself, for your inner soul and for the joy of life. Believe me, your body and your mind are moaning for lack of maturity. We grow up and we alienate from everything that is beautiful, from those little things you used to see when you could barely reach the door handle. We forgot to run out to play even now, as grown-ups. When was the last time you ran around the table with a friend, with your boyfriend or with who knows who? I know, there are problems to attend and there is no time for fooling around. When were you for the last time in a toy store without holding your kid’s hand? You’ll be amazed, it will enchant you, no matter how many your worries are.


Bottom line… I certainly miss wearing my shoes one instead of another and just sitting and laughing, writing on walls, learning poems by heart and taking dictation. I miss packing for camp, putting tooth paste everywhere and sewing all the pyjamas. Honestly, I miss performing surgery on toads. Do you think it’s disgusting? It used to be an art for me.


We like to think we’ve grown up and got into the world of troubles with taxes, dues, mortgages, debts and so on. We are running around, always having something to sort out, and answering the phone ringing or an e-mail. No problem if you bang into a pillar, you still hold your phone. In the restaurant, the kids yell and mothers, bothered by their statute of sitters throw them the I-phone or whatever comes handy, hoping to make them stop. I know, this is what grown-up life means, but this maturity makes us bitter, we think more, analyse excessively and friends get fewer. How nice and sincere used to be our friendships way back when we went to steal cherries from the neighbours. Love was also blooming while we became teenagers. Such sincere feelings we used to have, no worries and no troubles, no questions and no lies! When you’re a child you love with all your heart, sob and wait. Wake up, folks; remember yourselves and the joy of your soul! Life is much shorter than we can even imagine and one day you realize you can’t get out of bed and you’d like to be able to run around the table. Believe me, it will be too late, so leave aside everything which has to do with grown-ups’ world, at least for a few moments every day. Laugh with your friends; love your family, play! Deep inside you’re still a child.


We grow up every day, growing old, forgetting to be ourselves.


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