People in general.
We are all alike: two hands, two feet, two eyes, one nose, one mouth… and so on. We are practically, made by the same pattern. Hair is distinctive, long, short, blond or dark and also the eye colour. Then, we can talk about height and why not about weight. We wish to be taller when we are short. So very few people love their body and have no complexes about it. You are either thinking you’re fat, your breasts are too small, your legs too lean or your posterior to flask and so on… always discontent. I know very few people with a perfect body and no major flaws. Either they were lucky and God made them like that, or they work hard for it. Some of them choose surgery and sometimes the results are exceptionally good, but most of the time, after a while, they are a total disaster. I have nothing against cosmetic surgery, if needed and one can afford it, why not? Bottom line, speaking about the appearance, we are all made of the same stuff, just in different shapes and colours. After spending some time abroad, I figured out that people of every nation have something special, something which helps you to identify them. I have to mention that fashion style helps me a lot to categorize people. Just a couple of days ago, I noticed a boy and a girl in the subway. She was pretty tall, a bit curvy, wearing light coloured jeans with white belt, white woollen sweater revealing her belly button and long nails. Her make-up was put in a hurry and she had her hair in a pony tail. She was speaking loudly and she seemed to show off. He was not too different from her: jeans, black snickers, polo sweater with raised collar, D&G belt with a buckle as big as the palm of his hand and a slightly shiny black jacket. His hair was filled with gel and the necklace was also in place. I smiled and continued to watch them. All three of us were from the same country of origin. The young girl glanced at me with sort of hostility, but to be completely honest I was staring at them as the way she was munching gum draw my attention. I guess she was doing it for quite some time and it was hard enough for her to feel the taste of it. I am so mean.
Let’s get back to people in general. The idea is that our inner selves are so much different so I am not sure if I could define a person. I think I have all sort of friends from different countries. Culture is pretty important and also the environment, in which you were raised, but the character and the habits are so different so I often get to ask myself if I am mad and the rest are normal or if it is the other way around. For example, a good and old friend of mine with whom I’ve been almost every day so it looks like we’ve started with the same idea, on the same way and with the same opinions. I always considered her a supportive person, someone I can rely on. I recently met her after we’ve been apart for a while. We had a coffee in the same old place, we ate what we always eat and we started to chat. It wasn’t so much time since we’ve last met, but I was feeling lost, like talking to a completely different person than the one I used to know. She had become a bad, envy person, full of negative energy. I felt stuck. I could never think that in just three months you can get from one extreme to the other. I tried to figure out if there was something wrong that I said or if she was misinterpreting my words and my happiness. I didn’t talk about great stuff, just about little achievements which, at our age, may often be insignificant. She was the same person, with the same name, same fashion style, and same look. Her mind was gone crazy and her envy had darkened her thoughts, like she was stuck in a labyrinth and she wasn’t even willing to escape from it. I was sincerely sorry and she noticed me gazing several times asking if there was something wrong. I looked at her and said nothing. I wish I could help her by telling her she was wrong, but who am I to tell what’s right and what’s wrong. Maybe she’s happy with who she is today. Maybe what I see as a troubled behaviour is where she finds her ambition. I stopped talking, let her show off and I realised this is what she needed. I encouraged her and told her she was the best. After regaining her senses, she looked at me and thanked me with a smile. I wasn’t the only one she was maliciously analysing; I felt she was envying her own mother too. What a pity!
What is that makes us change? What makes us different? And what can cloud our mind so much? Maybe I was also envious. I looked and I desired. I heard and I wished. But I have never judged someone for being better, prettier, richer or smarter than me. I’ve always wanted to learn, to know as much as possible. Yes, I have envied to, but in a positive manner. I decided to get there myself; I said it out loud and did not hide it. Of course I also made unintentional mistakes. Maybe I glared, or said something without thinking or I hoped for too much. But the people who really know me can witness I have never been jealous for something other people had more than I did. I am jealous only when it comes about love, extremely jealous. Tomorrow I’ll get back to that, but until then, say NO to envy, say NO to negative thinking. Envy induces pain, frustration and suffering, and what for? Choose to live in harmony, free of negative thoughts.